Sleep...Sleep...Sleep

I am a night owl which you can see by the times on most of my posts. I like to enjoy my quiet, clean house from the time my kids go to bed (during the school year that is most nights like 7:30) until 11:30 or even midnight. It is my time to unwind, get organized, pick up after my tribe of wild people, etc.

Most nights that is great because I have (most nights) really good sleepers.

I was blessed with my first Keegan, being the baby that woke up to eat, went right back to sleep and when I brought him in our bed to feed him in the morning, he'd go back to sleep until 10! It was awesome!! Then Delaney who spent 10 days in the NICU at birth, didn't like a big fuss when it was bedtime. She I think, was used to just going to sleep on her own, so I could just lay her down and off to Dreamland she'd go, at a decent hour AND she'd sleep until 9 or so! Cam was SO GROUCHY as a newborn baby, I couldn't figure out why he fussed so much, well turns out I couldn't produce enough milk, he was hungry! Brought in some feeding reinforcements and Voila! Happy sleeper. He also went down easy like Delaney because he too was a NICU newborn. 

SO Maddie, she doesn't like to go down AS easy lately, as she was since we put her in a big girl bed but nonetheless, if I put her in her bed, and set the baby gate up, she gives up the fight, crawls back in be and is out like a light. She will sleep until 7:30 or 8am. Not as late as the others I think because WE are all up making noise, getting ready for school. If I don't put the gate up she will persist, and come in our room, and trick her dad into bringing her in our bed :) I'm sure some of you are like MEAN MOM! YOUR LAST LITTLE BABY! YOU WON'T LET HER IN THE BED! Let me paint you a picture. 

Tiny little girl in between Mom and Dad in king size bed. Mom clinging for dear life to left side of bed, trying not to fall off. Baby foot in face and in back. Dad hanging onto to right side by laying on his side as straight up as possible, seeing as he has a baby head pushing into his back. Now here's baby horizontal, straight across the middle of the bed, the three of us making a capital H. Suddenly my nice big bed, doesn't feel so big or so nice.

 Flash to last night. I'm not feeling great. Having a little trouble falling asleep, finally about 1ish sleep comes. 2:15AM I hear rumblings and movement just down the hall in Maddie's room. Gates up so I think I'm OK. She starts to cry a little, and gets progressively louder and more determined with her wails. Signaling that she is waking. Neither Joe or I moves. I know he hears her and he knows I hear her, but we wait it out, WHO will be the first to crack?!?! He rolls over with a very questionable and strategic "snore"/sigh. That's it! I'm it. I get up, go into her room, put her back in bed, turn on her mobile, snuggle her up and success! Her eyes close, my eyes begin to close. She starts to make that sleepy, slowing breath sounds, I feel myself drifting off with her. Minutes, but feels like moments later, my arm is losing circulation. She is asleep, I'M OUTTA HERE! :) I slowly start to move my arm from under her pillow. Saying a silent prayer. Please God, let her continue sleeping. I AM SO TIRED! Slowly but steadily I get my arm out to my wrist and then just as I pull my hand out, she opens her eyes looks right at me and SCREAMS BLOODY MURDER! Uggghhhh! WHY! I start to think...Maybe if I get the hell out of here, she will go right back to sleep. I run for the door on silent strides, jump the gate, trip, hit the wall across the hall. OH my Gosh are you serious right now! I head for my room and hide in the bathroom. Minutes later I hear movement in my room just outside the door. I had kept the light off to not attract attention from Maddie's room. I walk out, through the darkness, I can barely see, but I hear...what is that...Oh my gosh that is Maddie's breathing. Joe has "SAVED" her and brought her in our bed! Seriously! Now I'm not only sharing my bed with a miniature bucking bronco, but HE gets to be the good guy. He didn't know where I was so he's down the hall looking for me in the other kids rooms. He re-enters our room, to be confronted by me. "Really Joe! I was trying to get her back to sleep on her own!" "She was screaming! :(" he says. "I couldn't just LEAVE her in there!" So there we are an hour later. Falling off our respective sides of the bed. Foot in face, head in back. getting kicked, and cried at if we try to move her. I am so tired and uncomfortable, that when Joe's alarm goes off at 5:30 I halfway consider getting up and getting going. But my entire shoulder and arm is asleep, so I roll over and adjust Maddie to the vertical position. She rolls over, puts her arm around my neck and sighs. You know that I am so happy and comfortable and sleeping sigh. OK! I'll go back to sleep. But in the back of my head all I hear now is...

SUCKERS!!!!!! :)

Oh well. What are you going to do. I guess that's why we got the big bed :) 

Perhaps a nap will be in order later. Probably not! Perhaps I'll choose to hit the hay early tonight. Probably not! :) It's not the first time I've been sleep deprived, it won't be the last. I try to keep it all in perspective. Alan Jackson has a song, Remember when. I hear it often after nights like this. 

"Remember when....The sound of little feet wasn't music.....

 Remember when- we said when we turned grey, when the children, grew up and moved away. We won't be sad, we'll be glad, for all the life we had...And we'll remember when"

I know someday, we'll look back and laugh and wish the kids still wanted to come snuggle us. Actually I'm already laughing. I hit the wall REALLY hard and I can only imagine how awesome I looked as a midnight track star jumping the hurdle! 

Have a great day! Bring on the COFFEE!

Ashley

p.s. It's 9:31 and Maddie's still sleeping. In MY bed. Lucky little monster :)