Dream Jeans

Warning if you are a guy or a child, the next post may be alarming to you :)

So I completed 2 full miles without stopping! Woohoo for me! But that is not what I would like to discuss. I say this next sentence with the hope that some of you women, especially moms, know what I am talking about, but that I am the only one saying it out loud, so with that.

Why the HECK do I feel like I am going to pee in my freaking pants every time I run?!?!?!? Is it not enough that I am NOT a natural born runner but am doing it anyway? Is it not enough that I feel like my freaking boobs are going to break off and fly off the treadmill every time I run, so I have to wear 2 BRAS. I guess not!

I mean I realize pretty much once a week as it is, a new way my body has forever been changed as a mother. It started after Keegan, with whom during my pregnancy I thought, WHAT? I'm 21 years old, I just got married, I am at my best weight ever- Bring on the Cocoa Krispies, and the Subway meatball sandwich and the whopper Jr. and of course you can stop and get Doritos and a 100 grand bar every day on your way home from work. Why not! Well I'll tell you why not.

I had Keegan and though I was now 22. I lost a lot of my baby weight but I still had 22 to lose too. I actually still have my favorite pair of jeans from before I had Keegan. They are Silver brand, low rise, fitted in the butt and flared at the bottom. Dark but not too dark and with the perfect wear. I LOVE these jeans. Obviously I saved them all this time (Just shy of 10 years to be exact.) I don't really think I'll ever wear them again, but they make me happy. Just sitting in my closet on the top shelf. I have from time to time taken them down, dusted them off and pulled them......um up to my thighs! "WHAT THE HELL!!" I shout. Believe me, you would not want to see me in these jeans today. Imagine a sausage casing that is stuffed too full. It is not pretty. Why do we not appreciate what we have while we have it? Human nature I guess. It doesn't bring me down though. I actually have been known to laugh hysterically at these moments. I know those jeans don't fit, because I traded them in for 4 little blessings/monsters and a couple little sizes. I think everyone should have a pair of dream jeans maybe they aren't a dream in the way that a goal would be, but more of like I traded one dream for another. A material reminder of the choices we make and the journeys we take.
So I will continue to run. And perhaps I will find a new pair of dream jeans. And best of all. I'm OK with both.

Here's to sweet dreams - Real and Realized!
Ashley